“Black Ink Crew” Star Ceaser Emanuel has had a pretty successful career. He stars in a popular reality show and owns several tattoo shops across the nation, including in New York, Georgia and Florida. However, it didn’t always come easy, and there were a few times the reality star and businessman almost lost it all. 

During episode one of the “Rare Knomads” podcast with hosts Jims World, an entertainment personality, and rapper/actor Rap Is A Martial Art earlier this month, Ceaser sat down with the guys to talk about his career and his perspective on failure. When asked about his most defining loss and the lessons he learned from his experience, the 41-year-old mentioned his former “Black Ink Crew” co-star and ex-fiancée Dutchess Lattimore.

In a candid conversation, around the 25-minute mark, Ceaser admitted that losing Dutchess was the “most defining loss” of his life. The tattoo boss expressed that he lost more than his partner when the pair broke up, but he lost one of his most trusted confidantes when it came to discussing matters regarding his business. 

“You know the funny thing is, I never really thought about that s–t until you really said that s–t,” Ceaser admitted. “But my most defining loss of my life I have to say was is when I lost my fianceé. Because you know… it’s not the fact that, you know what I mean, me and her split and all that over s–t. It was the fact that, knowing when you had somebody who like…Jim knows, we from the hood. There’s a lot of things we didn’t grow up knowing like logistics of business and s–t like that.”

Ceaser continued, “So when she left, I had to start second-guessing everything — you feel me? Because I didn’t know business. I had two shops at the time, and I’m just still trying to figure it out.”

However, he says, losing Dutchess helped create the businessman he is today because he no longer had someone to rely on and was forced to take care of his business affairs independently. 

“Now it’s like God put me in a position that basically, ‘N-gga, don’t ever rely on nobody. You got this s–t,’” he said. “And at that point is when I started expanding. As soon as she left, three months later, I opened up Black Ink Atlanta. And then from then, I haven’t stopped opening up shops. That’s why it bummed me out you asked me that question because I really never ever thought about that s–t until right now because that loss in itself helped propel me to the man I am right now.”

Ceaser and Dutchess dated for a while before getting engaged in 2015. However, the pair called it quits a year later. The Pretty-N-Ink owner accused Ceaser of cheating on her. He also accused her of doing the same. The two have since cut off all communication. Check out the full interview with Ceaser below.