‘What Was I Thinking?!’: I’m Losing Sleep Over An Agreement My Husband and I Made If Either of Us Cheated. I Just Confessed to An Affair.
I have been a happily married woman for close to 10 years. It’s a rarity to see me without my husband and vice versa. We run a trucking company, so we work together outside of the home and virtually it’s a 24/7 operation being married to my hubby, which I love.
Black woman crying (Credit: Pexels)
Two months ago, I attended my high-school reunion alone because my husband was sick. He encouraged me to go though I didn’t want to go without him. I ended up having a great time and am glad that I went.
The highlight of the evening was reconnecting with a crush from high school named Reggie. Reggie and I always had a thing for each other but never actually stepped over the line to explore it. We innocently exchanged numbers at the reunion and have been talking to each other every day nonstop.
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I feel like I’m in high school again, but there’s also a sense of guilt because it’s the only thing I’ve ever kept from my husband. As weeks have passed, I have seen Reggie on several occasions and what started out as an innocent connection has turned into an all-out, full-blown love affair. Initially it was just some inappropriate emails and text messages but last weekend while my husband was out of town for a trucking conference, Reggie and I got a room and it went down.
The guilt of what happened ate me up to the point that I actually told my husband everything. What was I thinking?!
He was more disappointed than anything and said he feels like he lost his best friend. We always made a pact that if one of us ever cheated, the other one would get a hall pass for a night.
My husband wants to take me up on his hall pass, but I’m having second thoughts. I’m losing sleep each night as he shares his plans with me, including that he’s chosen to be with a woman that we both know. Not only I do I have to deal with his desire to follow through on our initial agreement, but I now I have to face the consequences of my actions every time I see this woman. Should I at least be allowed to choose the woman that he spends one night with, no questions asked?
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