When my kids were younger, one of our favorite traditions was sitting by the tree with a stack of Christmas books. Stories like The Nativity Story helped us talk about the spiritual side of Christmas, while classics like The Gift of the Magi beautifully illustrated the power of selflessness and love. After reading, we’d take a few minutes to talk about the story’s message. “Why did the characters give up something they loved?” I’d ask, and I was always amazed at the thoughtful responses, even from my youngest.

We also made it a point to revisit these stories every year. As the kids grew, their understanding deepened, and the discussions became even more meaningful. To this day, I believe those quiet moments spent reading together helped shape how they view Christmas, not as a time of endless wish lists, but as a season for giving, gratitude, and connection.

If your family loves stories, consider adding a few more modern ones, too. Books like The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey or The Snowman (with its themes of friendship and fleeting moments) are wonderful for younger readers. For older kids, A Christmas Carol is a timeless classic that highlights transformation, generosity, and the importance of helping others.

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Our family always sits down and makes a gratitude list together during the holiday season. Everyone would take turns sharing something they were thankful for, whether it was a warm house, time spent with loved ones, or a favorite memory from the year. We’d write these down on a big sheet of paper and hang it up where we could see it, sometimes adding to it in the days leading up to Christmas. It was heartwarming to see how the kids’ lists evolved. At first, their gratitude revolved around toys or treats, but eventually, they started recognizing non-material blessings (although Xbox did constantly make a recurring appearance). 

As they got older and our holiday routines changed, we stopped doing this as regularly. But looking back, I miss those moments of intentional reflection and connection, and it’s something we’re considering bringing back this year. It’s such a simple tradition, but it helps center the season around what matters most: the blessings we already have, not just the ones we hope to receive.

This has to be one of the most powerful ways to help kids understand the true meaning of Christmas, to have them focus on gratitude. Taking a moment to pause and reflect on what they’re thankful for, beyond the gifts, can shift the focus from “What do I want?” to “What do I already have?”

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A friend of mine shared a wonderful tradition they’ve started with their kids to shift the focus from receiving to giving during the holiday season. Each year, they take a day to shop for gifts, not for themselves, but for people less fortunate via an organization that collects in the community. The goal is to teach their children the joy of giving.

Her kids, who are now tweens, get involved in choosing the gifts. They’ll brainstorm what might make someone else happy, a cozy blanket, a new toy, or even practical items like winter gloves. One year, her son insisted on picking out a colorful stuffed animal because “it’ll make someone smile.” They package the gifts together as a family, adding little touches like handwritten notes or festive wrapping before delivering them to the organization. 

What she loves most about this tradition is how it sparks conversations about generosity and kindness. They talk about how even small gestures can make a big impact and why helping others is such an important part of the holiday spirit. She told me her kids have come to look forward to this tradition just as much as opening their presents.

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At the heart of Christmas is the time we spend with the people we love. Amid the hustle of holiday preparations, prioritizing moments of togetherness is one of the best ways to show kids the true meaning of the season.

A simple way to do this is by planning intentional family activities. In our home, board games on Christmas Day have become a cherished tradition. After the gifts are unwrapped and breakfast is enjoyed, we gather around the table for a game everyone can play, something lighthearted that sparks plenty of laughter. It’s a wonderful way to connect and share the joy of the holiday.

Another favorite is a festive family movie night. We pick a classic holiday film like Elf or The Polar Express, pile on the blankets, and snack on popcorn or leftover Christmas cookies. There’s something magical about snuggling together while the glow of the tree lights fills the room.

Cooking a holiday meal or baking together is another great way to spend time as a family. Even younger kids can help with simple tasks like stirring batter or decorating cookies. It’s not about creating the perfect dish, it’s about the shared experience and the memories made along the way.

These moments of togetherness remind kids that Christmas isn’t about the number of presents under the tree, it’s about being with the people who matter most.

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Our neighbors have a beautiful tradition that has become a shining example of what the Christmas season is all about: practicing acts of kindness for elderly people in the community. What started as a reluctant chore for their older teens has transformed into one of the most cherished parts of their holiday routine, teaching their children the value of connection and respect for older generations.

It began with small gestures, like helping an elderly neighbor shovel snow. At first, the teens weren’t exactly eager participants, treating it as a box to check off before they could return to their plans. But as they spent more time helping, they began to form meaningful relationships with their neighbors. 

Over the years, this tradition has grown. Now, the teens help with decorating homes for Christmas, delivering small gifts, and even staying for tea to keep their neighbors company. The family has told us that this tradition has opened their children’s eyes to older people in their community. 

Acts of kindness don’t have to be grand to make an impact. Writing thank-you notes, helping a neighbor with yard work, or simply sharing a smile and a kind word can make someone’s day. These simple gestures are a beautiful way to teach kids the true spirit of Christmas.

A work colleague of mine has a touching tradition with his sister that’s become an essential part of their holiday season: volunteering at a homeless shelter every December 26th. It’s something they started many years ago when he was a late teen and his sister, ten years his senior, invited him to join her. What began as a one-time gesture has grown into an annual tradition that has deeply shaped his perspective on the season.

He told me that, at first, he agreed to go more out of obligation than enthusiasm. But once he was there, helping to serve meals and chatting with the shelter’s guests, his attitude quickly shifted. Seeing the gratitude on people’s faces and hearing their stories made him realize how impactful even small acts of kindness can be. Over the years, it’s become something he looks forward to, and he credits his sister for opening his eyes to the value of giving back.

Now, they make it a priority to volunteer together every year, no matter how busy life gets. My colleague says it’s not only strengthened his bond with his sister but also grounded him in the true spirit of the holidays: connection, generosity, and care for those who need it most.

One of the most enriching ways to help kids understand the true meaning of Christmas is by exploring how other cultures and religions celebrate the season—or similar holidays around the same time of year. It’s a beautiful way to show them that, while the traditions may differ, the values of love, community, and generosity are universal.

For example, you could share how many people in Mexico celebrate Las Posadas, a reenactment of Mary and Joseph’s search for shelter, or how Swedish families honor St. Lucia Day with candlelit processions. In Germany, St. Nicholas Day on December 6th brings gifts left in shoes, while in Ethiopia, Genna (Ethiopian Orthodox Christmas) is celebrated with a traditional meal and church services. Exploring these traditions together can spark curiosity and appreciation for the diverse ways people honor the season.

Teaching kids about different traditions is about more than learning facts, it’s about nurturing empathy and understanding. These traits are vital as kids grow up and encounter different people in their lives. 

How have you helped your children understand the true meaning of Christmas?

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